relational mindfulness
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Sunflower Mind® videoclip #7: Another Sun


The following video clip (3 minutes) is the seventh section of the 25-minute Sunflower Mind video about embodied relational mindfulness..




Transcript:

So, obviously, we want to pay attention to these things, not just because it's kind of interesting to know it, but as a help in order to make the changes we want. in big and small things.

So how do we change?

Well, I think part of the metaphor is to see that what's happening is a situation as a whole, as opposed to just say “me” or somebody, an isolated “self”. But it's a whole. It's the whole environment. This is what we are responding in the environment. In other words, we're perceiving the sun to be a certain place, and we're orienting toward it.

So if we want to change, it means that change will happen once we perceive the sun to be in a different place. It sounds a little crazy when I'm talking about it: “If you want to turn from here to there, all you have to do is move the sun. And, of course, in practice, if you take the metaphor literally, you cannot “move the sun”.

But we're talking about perceptions. And I'm not talking about tricks. It's not like: “Pretend the sun is where it is not. You see the sun here, and you pretend it is there.” It's a metaphor. So what it means is: In order to change, you have to pay attention to the whole environment, and to what in the environment is going to help you.

So, in practice: For instance, it’s something such as support groups. If you find something difficult to do, it's going to be easier if you find support groups. And so on and so forth. If you want to change a habit, say you want to go to the gym more often, what are you going to do in order to make it easier into your day, so it can fall into your habits?

If you tend to get very angry, very reactive to people, certain people who do certain things, what are you going to do? Not just telling yourself, "I have to stop being reactive." But how is the situation going to be changed? Okay.

So obviously I'm not giving you solutions for each of these things, but simply trying to use this as an example to talk about the idea of not changing simply from the place of, "I will change from willpower”, or “I will change from just understanding." But:
- I will change from understanding the situation as a whole,
- from understanding my place in the situation, understanding what it is that I am reacting to,
- and finding a way to find the “other sun" - what it is that helps me orient naturally the other way.


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See also: Demystifying Mindfulness: Active Pause®


 


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